Honestly Laid Bare

Sometimes, I do just feel like I'm wrestling with God. I haven't spent the time to REALLY seek Him, so I pick up on a sliver of His will for my life, and run with it. I do the grunt work to get involved in something like what I know He's put on my heart, and think, "This must be God's will." When maybe it isn't. 

We heard an excellent sermon on wrestling with God to get what He's already promised this week at Believers Tabernacle. And the more I think on it, the more I'm convicted. I have not been seeking God, and giving Him a lot of my time. I've been trying to decypher God's will and then running with it. So, over the next few weeks, as our church fasts for direction, I'm going to pursue my Jesus, My Father, for Him. I hope for answers, and leading, and maybe even a renewal of my calling, but I just want God. I want to be near Him, and to be so close as to smell His scent, to hear His breathing. I want to fall asleep to His comfort and peace. I want to wake up knowing the chaos drawing near is part of His plan, not my mistake.